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Versurile Peter, Paul And Mary - PAULTALK
Versuri PAULTALK
I'd like to call somebody to the stage that you
know as a folk singer
But that you haven't met in his other role
Paul is a comedian with a unique point of view
and commentary
And in this capacity, ladies and gentlemen
Please welcome with me to the stage, my good
friend
My compatriot, Paul Stookey
That was the sound of a golf ball
Or if you're a ping-pong enthusiast, that was a
sound of a ping-pong ball
Except generally you'll hear
That's the sound of a match between a golfer and
a ping-pong enthusiast
I played golf today, 18 holes I played golf, wooo
I did pretty good too, I think you would have
been very proud of me
Four. Five. Six Seven
I don't like sports very much
There's a vast number of sports that I'm not
invlved in.
There's water skiing
In order to water ski, really you should swim,
right?
You're not gonna stay up there all the time, now
And I don't like to swim, really
You know what swimming is to me?
Staying alive when I'm in the water.
Barely
I'll do anything to stay afloat
Even swallow Co2 cartriges
But I didn't come out here to talk about sports
I really, I came out here, Peter talks about
status
And I cannot think of one material object that
has more status in this country
Than the automobile
And it starts at a very early age now, right?
I mean, now at 14, kids want the car, right?
They get cheaters permits so they can drive
You get a learners permit at 15, a cheaters
permit at 14
And it's, I guess it's really necessary because
You lose a lot of face calling up a girl and
asking her
If you can peddle right over and pick her up,
right?
They don't really go for that any more
And if you look back on all the times you had the
automobile
Aside from a few interesting saturday evenings
You got to admit that one of the nicest times of
all
Was a sunday afternoon, if you could get the car
You come down the stairs, ker-clunk ker-clunk
ker-clunk ker-clunk
mom, dad, gonna take the car, ha haaa
Beautiful day for a drive, I think I'll go out
Ha haaa haaa ha huuu
And then, and then they level you with that giant
killer, right?
HAVE YOU DONE YOUR HOMEWORK?
If you were fast, you'd say, mom, dad, have I
done my homework?
Run out the door
You pick up 3 other great pretenders, 3 oclock in
the afternoon
The time is now 10 oclock in the evening
The same 4 guys are in the same car
Well, whata you wanna do?
I don't know, whada you wanna do?
Hey, we've been driving for 7 hours
Hey, I got an idea, he he
Yeah, what's that?
Lets go to a drive-in resturant and look at the
girls, hehehe
Oh, ok
Well, here they are, but they're all from our
high school
Wait a minute, there's a car load over there
There's a place right next to them, lets go get
it
Don't look at 'em
Here's the conversation in the girls car you
never heard
Here they come
There they are
Don't look at 'em
Remember the time when drive-ins first opened
And the girls used to come out to take your
order?
Now you're lucky you know, if you get a girl in
slacks who delivers it
I understand they're even putting in conveyor
belts in some drive-in resturants
There was a time when the little girls came
running out in short little skirts
Remember them?
You pull in
And the little girl would come running up
May I take your order sir?
Yes, but I don't believe it's on the menu, ha ha
They don't, they don't let you flirt any more now
They give you a little green box with a white
button on it
A little speaker grill, right
What?
Oh, ok, um, We'd like one cheeseburger deluxe
special extra
The one you have out here with the little white
cup
With that whatever that's in there, we'll take
it, whatever it is
And uh, we'd like two hamburgers medium rare with
everything on 'em
And one hamburger, no, one hamburger, meat, no
hamburgers
One frank, and three chiliburgers, ok?
Alright, and we'd like two chocolate shakes,
regular thick, for spoons you know THICK
And we'd like two strawberry shakes thin
Water them down, or milk them down a little, ok
'Cause we got somebody here with chapped lips and
they'd like it thin
Can, you understand what I mean?
Are you there?
Well, could you tell us what we have please?
And four six-packs
We'll take it
And after you get your food order in, you got at
least 40 minutes to wait
Even if it's just a cup of coffee you got 40
minutes to wait
And you cannot get out of your car, right
Remember there was a time when drive-ins first
opened
You used to pull in and get out, exchange hellos,
greetings
Evidentally some people were getting out and
exchanging
Something a little heavier than hellos and
greetings
They have policemen there to keep you in your car
You can be 47 years old and drop your credit
cards on the ground
Officer, that's my wallet
I don't care who you are kid back in the car
If you do get out, you gotta be very careful
Because the new resturants have radar now
So you have to crawl on your belly between the
cars
You get over to the side of the car
Psssst
Psssst down here!
I can't come up, they'll spot me
Put down your window
Power windows, huh?
Whoo, this is a pretty fancy car
Hey, you're a pretty fancy broad
If you did manage to get out of the drive-in
resturant without being maimed
There was a sporting event taking place at the
traffic light
Remember, with all of two characters
Mr. Businessman who drove a 4-door family sedan
with black-wall tires
Automatic transmission
Seated next to him in a 1941 gray primer coated
Ford
With it's rear end 2 inches off the ground
Tomato cans for mufflers
With his back to the drivers window, his left arm
draped over the steering wheel
His right hand gripped onto the gearshift lever
A sneer on lips sat THE KID
Well, Mr. Businessman has just had his bands
tightened, and
Those of you who are not quite sure what I mean
By having your bands tightened
The bands are the rings in an automatic
transmission
Which actually affect the gear change
Uh huh, I'll give you an example
This is an automobile with tight bands
This is an automobile with loose bands
Well, Mr. Businessman has just had his bands
tightened
And he thinks that he will show THE KID a thing
or two
Meanwhile, THE KID
Has inched these 2 fingers up over his left arm
This is the universal signlanguage among
teenagers for dragging
You probably recall Winston Churchill during the
war years
Which everyone assumed meant V for victory
Actually if you'll also recall Winston Churchill
smokes a cigar, right?
He used to hold it in here, right?
And occationally he would turn to his friends on
the stage and say
Want a drag?
See, and the kids picked it up
The light changes
The light changes to amber and Mr. Businessman
decides to get very daring
He pulls the automatic transmission down into low
He puts one foot on the brake
Still holding the foot on the brake, in order to
get that extra fast start
He pulls the automatic transmission down into low
And pushes down on the accelerator five inches
The car is internally hemorraging
He knows, he knows, he knows he's gonna have to
have another band job
He's not gonna let THE KID show him up
The light changes to green, Mr. Businessman is
off
Looks at the speedometer, 80, 90, 95, 96, 97, 98
miles an hour
Looks out the window and The Kids not even there
You know what's there?
He looks in the rear view mirror and The Kids
still back at the corner
He never races anybody
He just sits there and scares the hell out of
them
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