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Now I met me a girl and her name was Frutch And she liked dirt and me very much She said if she'd met me during the war And she found me hiding underneath the door Even if she was German and I was Dutch She wouldn't shoot me She was a fine girl, Frutch Shot me last Tuesday Now I met me a girl and her name was Scrot She kept a notebook with many a jot About how to turn a banknote into a cat And many such things just as useful as that But I told her she wouldn't dig it if she turned into a piece of gunshot She didn't listen She was a fine girl, Scrot I got her right here in my shoulder now thanks to Frutch Now I met me a girl and her name was Blit And she bought a do-it-yourself submarine kit She tried it in the bath and it went down the plug And she was inside it, she was making it chug When she found there wasn't no place at all for her to sit She didn't worry none She was a fine girl, Blit She was still standing when she passed Norroway for the fourth time Now I met me a girl and her name was Twing She looked like a yoyo without a string She rolled up and down like a solid hoop Right round the block and right through the soup And right through the stew and the chicken stuffing She was a fine girl, Twing She was a good cook as cooks go...she went! Now I met me a girl and her name was Plof She had a car with a nasty cough She fed it with aspirins and vitamin pills Lotions and potions for to cure all ills 'Til you couldn't see the car for three miles of froth Big Claimsville She was a fine girl, Plof Car don't cough no more Just sits in the garage all day long And screams for the doctor Hypochondriac!





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