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Versurile Bif Naked - Obsessed With Childhood
Versuri Obsessed With Childhood
I have to tell you I am obsessed with my
childhood. I never pooped. Iâ₉„¢m serious, I
hated pooing, I never did it. I refused to poo as
child. Mostly, I couldnâ₉„¢t. It wasnâ₉„¢t meat
loaf, it wasnâ₉„¢t chicken and rice, it wasnâ₉„¢t
six hot-dogs at lunch with Kraft Dinner on top, it
wasnâ₉„¢t Sloppy Joeâ₉„¢s, it wasnâ₉„¢t inactivity, I
just never ever pooped. My parents had this house
on Milinocket Court that had a bathroom upstairs.
It had a door in the hallway and a door in the
master bedroom. They used to close the hallway
door, open the bedroom door, sit me on the potty
and pull the t.v. in there you know, so Iâ₉„¢d sit
and watch and …wait. I mean hours. I must have
been rotting insdie1 It would be like a week in
between. You know, I discussed this at length
with my mom, and she was concerned thinking she
fed me too much meat and stuff. But you know what
I say, my two sisters had no problem pooping, and
they ate the same suppers. It was just me. I was
sick as a child, I mean I was always sick.
If I fell off my bike and got a scrape, it would
be infected. When I had the chicken pox, I was
hospitalized because each pock was infected.
Each one! In my eyelids, everywhere. The nurses
had to dab each pock with a medicated cotton ball.
My dad used to take us camping, and this one time
I stepped on a dirty nail, you know, like rusty,
with my barefoot. My whole hell became infected
(laughs). It was hug! My heel was the size of a
volleyball! I had to go to the doctor and get it
drained. I was so ticklish all the time it took 5
or 6 doctors and nurses to hold me down and then
the feeling of the lanced hell, and I was
screaming. My older sister was laughing her head
off, right there. I had scarletina this one time,
and was quarantined. I had a tonsillectomy. I
even remember one time in the hospital, of course
for you know the reason. A nurse was trying to
put a suppository in my rear end. I was squirming
and wrigglinâ₉„¢ and gigglinâ₉„¢. You know, cause
I was getting tickled. Then Iâ₉„¢d cry, c
ause I was all tense, you know, and it hurt.
Sooner or later, I had to make a run for it to the
bathroom. Boy, those nurses sure got mad at me
for leavinâ₉„¢ a trail. Someoneâ₉„¢s always mad,
hey? You know, I took lots of things as a kid;
ballet and jazz, dance, soccer, piano. I was
always in trouble, always beinâ₉„¢ a ham. When I
was 5 we were all on the stage with these
cardboard clocks like, you know, two feet across,
tied around us with string, like a sandwich board.
We were all moving our arms back and forth, tick,
tock, tick, tock, tick, tock . I was wearing red
buckle shoes, that I know. Well, my string broke
and the clock fell off, night there on stage, I
just stood there, frozen, and bawling. The
teacher had to walk on to the stage and carry me
off. You know, I reacted the same way when that
stagedivinâ₉„¢ crowd surfer kicked my microphone
into my teeth. Hey, the more things change. I
quit all of it eventually. Dance class cause I
got lazy, soccer cause I grew boobs, and piano
cause my teac
her, Mrs. Davies, got mad at me and called me a
stupid girl and banged my hands on the keys. You
know I was even a cheerleader. Hey, in grade 6 in
Kentucky it was a cool thing. ‘S-U-C-C-E-S-S,
thatâ₉„¢s the way we spell success!â₉„¢. I canâ₉„¢t
believe it. (laughs) ‘V-I-C-T-O-R-Y, victory,
victory is our cry gotta goâ₉„¢. Thatâ₉„¢s how it
went. I donâ₉„¢t really remember the hand
movements. But, uh, I was never one of the
popular cheerleaders. I remember this girl April
was very popular, and this other girl Jennifer was
very popular. There were like, we were all in
grade 6, but they had, like, bodies of 17year old
people. And, and hey looked like Farrah Fawcett,
you know all blond with feathered hair and endless
teeth. I didnâ₉„¢t look like that. I wonder if my
dad wouldnâ₉„¢t have moved us around so much, what
if I woulda turn out different? You know, normal?
Or am I? I, Iâ₉„¢m obsessed with my childhood.
Cause I dontâ₉„¢ think Iâ₉„¢m fully grown up. Are
you? I mean really? I am my inner child. I
had to search for my inner adult. And Iâ₉„¢m
still lookinâ₉„¢. I still eat 6 hot dogs for
lunch, theyâ₉„¢re just vegetarian now.
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