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i really don't know what i'm doing here i really think i should've gone to bed tonight but... just one drink and there're some people to meet you i think that you'll like them i have to say we do and i promise in less than than an hour we will honestly go... now why don't i just get you another while you just say hello... yeah just say hello... so i'm clutching it tight another glass in my hand and my mouth and the smiles moving up as i stand up too close and too wide and the smiles are too bright and i breathe in too deep and my head's getting light but the air is getting heavier and it's closer and i'm starting to sway and the hands all on my shoulders don't have names and they won't go away so here i go here i go again... falling into strangers and it's only just eleven and i'm staring like a child until someone slips me heaven and i take it on my knees just like a thousand times before and i get transfixed that fixed and i'm just looking at the floor just looking at the floor yeah i look at the floor... and i'm starting to laugh like an animal in pain and i've got blood on my hands and i've got hands in my brain and the first short retch leaves me gasping for more and i stagger over screaming on my way to the floor and i'm back on my back with the lights and the lies in my eyes and the colour and the music's too loud and my head's all the wrong size so here i go here i go again... yeah i laugh and i jump and i sing and i laugh and i dance and i laugh and i laugh and i laugh and i can't seem to think where this is who i am why i'm keeping this going keep pouring it out keep pouring it down keeping it going keep pouring it down and the way the rain comes down hard... that's the way i feel inside... i can't take it anymore this it i've become this is it like i get when my life's going numb i just keep moving my mouth i just keep moving my feet i say i'm loving you to death like i'm losing my breath and all the smiles that i wear and all the games that i play and all the drinks that i mix and i drink until i'm sick and all the faces i make and all the shapes that i throw and alll the people i meet and all the words that i know makes me sick to the heart oh i feel so tired... and the way the rain comes down hard... that's how i feel inside...

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