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Versurile Bloodhound Gang - I wish i was queer so i could get chicks
Versuri I wish i was queer so i could get chicks
If your ass is a Chinese restaurant I'll have the
poo-poo platter
My friend Jerry Vandergrift kissed me in Home Ec.
class
Later in the afternoon some jarheads in the
locker room kicked my ass
I said guys I'm like you I like Monster Trucks
too
Wanna see how many push-ups I can do?
I just wish I was queer so I could get chicks
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
But if I were handsome just imagine how great it
would be
Incognito as gay though but not actually that way
though pseudo homo phony
Maybe it's a stupid theory or maybe just
stupidity
But if I was a queerbee in the fashion industry
Scoring with a super model would be easy
Cause 'super model' means voluptuous but is also
is synonomous with 'super dumb'
Ya see I'd be a good listener so she'd treat me
like a sister and soon I'd become
That trusted friend that cares that rubs her back
and braids her hair
No it wouldn't be a week before I'm in her
underwear
I wish I was queer so I could get chicks
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
Doesn't matter what I'm packin' in my denim it's
what's in my genes
The only smoked meat the only sausage I would eat
is made by Jimmy Dean
See I'm not to keen on the smell of Vaseline
No I'm not Princess Di and I don't wanna be a
queen
I wish I was queer so I could get chicks
Anyway if I were gay I'd have to change my name
to Dirk or Lewis
Hang out with my mom's hair stylist his name is
Kip he's got a lisp he talks like this
And wear my mother's lingerie learn the songs of
Broadway
And appreciate Depeche Mode and avant garde
ballet
I wish I was queer so I could get chicks
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks dig guys that are
Queer guys that don't dig
Chicks that don't dig guys like me
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
And I don't shave my heiny
Don't shave my heiny
See I'm not queer I'm too ugly
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